This could be due to my age. One thing I always said about my 20s was I am happy to have them end. Through a lot of fun, growth, amazing experiences, and feeling true love, I think that they have been a full decade about figuring out who the fuck I am. Pulling out all the imperfections, not accepting them yet, But very rapidly being introduced to them. For most of it, the concept of understanding how I affect the world around me has been hazy. The concept of not just going through life, day by day, reacting to the world, but understanding the role I play in the events that transpire. The last couple of years have been heavy in navigating through that haze.
Slowly but surely, my demons make themselves more and more known. I invite them to show their faces and continue to offer myself, as in "This is me."